Blog — How do we talk to children about death
Kids Experience Fear
Advice for Grandparents Advice for Parents Blog Post Children and Loss Dr Emily McClatchey How do we talk to children about death Kidolences Blog Professional Help Talking to Children Understanding Death
Anxiety, fears and worries escalate in all times of loss for kids, not just in grief over death. Loss, change, and grief can cause upheaval that can cause children to regress to behaviors they have outgrown or that are more commonly seen in younger children. Children who were easy to potty train and mastered independent toileting may begin bed-wetting. You may notice sleep difficulties, nightmares, or a fear of the dark. In school, students may have difficulty concentrating, may easily lose focus, or may develop academic troubles. This aspect of child grieving – the anxiety and fear- can be the most trying for parents to watch their child struggle with. Our hearts break for them, and we may even feel frustrated or overwhelmed. Here are some tips for dealing with your child’s anxiety following a loss.
Kids Crave Ritual: Part Three
Advice for Grandparents Advice for Parents Blog Post Children and Loss Dr Emily McClatchey How do we talk to children about death Kidolences Blog Kids Need Ritual Professional Help Talking to Children Understanding Death
In times of loss or change, rituals can be comforting to all of us, but especially for children. Yet it is precisely at times of loss and change that rituals are often abandoned—adults become too swamped with managing the accompanying chaos of change that they fail to attend to rituals that could bring peace and grounding. Indeed, rituals take time and forethought and energy, commodities that grow scarce during crisis. It can feel overwhelming to add “orchestrating a ritual” to your to-do’s in challenging times. But I encourage you, for the sake of your children, to consider it.
Kids Crave Ritual: Part Two
Advice for Grandparents Advice for Parents Blog Post Children and Loss Dr Emily McClatchey How do we talk to children about death Kidolences Blog Kids Need Ritual Professional Help Talking to Children Understanding Death
Funerals are but one of many ceremonies our society has created to honor life’s passages. We don’t think twice about including our children in other important ceremonies, from birthdays to weddings to anniversaries. In many such celebratory events we even give children an important and central role to play. Why not funerals?
Kids Feel Real Pain
Advice for Grandparents Advice for Parents Advice for sick children Blog Post Children and Loss Dr Emily McClatchey How do we talk to children about death Kidolences Blog Kids Need Ritual Professional Help Talking to Children Understanding Death
In times of stress for children, it is crucial to help them maintain healthy and adaptive coping strategies. At these times, you might notice an increase in aches, pains, and nebulous boo boos. Appetites may markedly change. Sleep habits can shift. Stomachaches and headaches become more common. Children may act out aggression, anxiety, and sadness through their bodies. All of these symptoms are very real and should be treated as such; they are not simply ploys to garner attention.
Kids Tell Their Stories
Advice for Grandparents Advice for Parents Blog Post Children and Loss Dr Emily McClatchey How do we talk to children about death Kidolences Blog Professional Help Talking to Children Understanding Death
Children are naturally drawn to stories and storytelling. Storytelling creates cohesion and fosters understanding. Allowing children the freedom to tell their stories gives them a sense of self-competence and confidence as they face challenges. By becoming authors of their own experience, children can regain a sense of control and understanding following loss. Journaling, drawing, creating and communicating with others about loss promotes healing from grief and honors the child’s relationship with that which has been lost.